.Our new beginnning.

ME !

Name: Choong Jiun Perng Alvin(小四)

D.O.B: 24/02/1987

Hometown: CCK

Current Status: Enlisted on 9 July 2008. Now a trainee in Signals.

Future: Hoping to study a PT/FT degree in SIM. An alternative will be to be a teacher.

MY LETTERS

CREDITS

Designer: Sillyclock
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MY DREAMS

* I dun dream big. Just a decent salary to support a family, an enjoyable working environment, keeping in contact with my pals. Last but not least is to stay healthy MAN!!!.

MY ESCAPE

shestheone
Val
CoachMax
YingQi
QiXiang
Jamie
Dong
Dnise
AlanChan
Xiuey
Jasney

MY HECTIC PAST

April 2005
May 2005
June 2005
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
February 2006
May 2006
July 2006
September 2006
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
September 2008
November 2008

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Well, many wonderful, fun, happy, interesting and happening events took place during my absence here but i shall share with u guys some other days. Haven been feeling positive recently. I think i have been deceiving myself all these years. Should have stop it right after my Os. Should juz play it as a leisure. Shouldnt have set high goals and hoping one day that i can attain them. Should have followed what Carmen said, " basketball is not for short ppl like us to play". Now, i have made my life miserable. One should be enjoying when he is doing smth he loves to do. But im different. I am not enjoying while im doin smth i love to do, instead im stress about it. This thing had also brought disappointment, low self esteem, unhappiness, etc, to me. Now, my love for it has started to decrease. I have finally come up with a decision after so long, which is to give up what i love to do. LAN QIU. Not as in to completely stop playing but juz decided i shouldnt continue to be a clown or be humiliated to carry on trying to play competitively. All this while, i know that i do not foot the bill. I think i shouldnt waste more time in hopin to be selected to play for the sch anymore. I have been quite lucky for my first 2 years. In order words, i already ZHUAN dao le. Anyway i dun even think i stand any chances to be in the final 12 man squad. Although you guys might say, " u never try how u noe???" Well some things can just base on feelings ba. Or perhaps if i dun try, i will not experience any disappointment. Im also quite tired of playing competitive bball all these years. No results to show. I have been quite ugly in front of those ppl who noe me, as in being a fool of myself. I kind of have enough of these bad experiences. I juz wanna thank those who had supported, motivated me, giving me chances, having confidence in me (ShiFu), helping and imparting skills and knowledge of the game all these years. Super appreciate it. You guys are the best!

But I cant really give up totally, as i still gotta try to get into yew tee csc. At least i cannot let my coach down. I dun wan him to noe that im so useless. I hope he will be proud of me some day althoug chances are slim. It was him who brought me to the competitive scene of the game. Without him bringing me into eng tat. I wouldnt be playing outside tournaments like youth cup, skudai, yew cheow tong cup, taman jurong cup and hougang cup. He will always be my only coach and most respectable personel on the court. So no matter what, i still gotta persevere and train with full determination.

Now that i have come up with this decision. My life seems very dull. I do not really have any targets or goals. It really seems meaningless. Simply live for the sake of living. haix... slowly everyone will call me alvin instead of xiao si....

1:13 AM